I'm actually starting to like my Health class, I know major shocker considering how much I complain on here about how I hate school lol. The health class is interesting its on violence and currently we are discussing domestic violence, and gender roles. We read an excerpt from an 1950's high school Home-ec book titled "How to be a good wife". When I first saw the excerpt title all I could think is you have got to be kidding me. The excerpt is basically a guideline for how society in 1950 's believed all women should behave in order to be a good wife. Since the excerpt is pretty long I'll just focus on the parts I found to be the most interesting.
On to "Checklist for choosing a mate", so the teacher gave everyone a checklist and the class had to pick out the characteristics that would want in a mate. After I filled out the checklist, I realized I picked a few things I wouldn't normally pick like friendly and sensitive lol. I picked 24 characteristics out of 42. I think we will never meet a mate that embodies every single one of the characteristics, however I do think people have a few characteristics that are a must. Out of the list of things I picked, the most important to me is sense of humor.
In class we has an interesting discussion on how violence in a relationship starts and how it doesn't start out with a slap to the face right off the back. A lot of people myself included when hearing about women who get abused, I would always say "I would never stay" or "I wouldn't put up with that." I think a lot of times we are on the outside looking in and we don't get their reasons for why they stay, only the person staying really understands. I think a lot of us don't take into account how hard is it to walk away from a relationship, for some people in an abusive relationship leaving might be just as hard as staying. The one thing I never understood about controlling people are what are they so scared of. It was interesting how the professor posed us question such as "lets say you always call your boyfriend on your way home from school and one day you forget because there is a shoe sale at the mall and you leave your phone in the car. You come back to your car and you have 10 missed calls, would you leave?" No one in the class said they would, I thought it was weird but not controlling. The professor basically went over how things start out great but how things slowly change over time and people can become more controlling. The professor was saying how when you first meet someone you are in the honeymoon phase so a lot of the things they do that may be red flags a lot of us would brush them off. It's interesting how controlling behavior can start out small and lead to something totally different. When people think of an abusive relationship we automatically assume someone is putting their hands on the person, but that's not always the case and words can cut as deep as a slap to the face.
- "Listen to him. You may have a dozen things to tell him, but the moment of his arrival is no the time. Let him talk first."
- "Make the evening his. Never complain if he does not take you out to dinner or to other pleasant entertainment."
- "Have dinner ready. Plan ahead, even the night before...This is a way of letting him know that you have been thinking about him and are concerned about his needs."
On to "Checklist for choosing a mate", so the teacher gave everyone a checklist and the class had to pick out the characteristics that would want in a mate. After I filled out the checklist, I realized I picked a few things I wouldn't normally pick like friendly and sensitive lol. I picked 24 characteristics out of 42. I think we will never meet a mate that embodies every single one of the characteristics, however I do think people have a few characteristics that are a must. Out of the list of things I picked, the most important to me is sense of humor.
In class we has an interesting discussion on how violence in a relationship starts and how it doesn't start out with a slap to the face right off the back. A lot of people myself included when hearing about women who get abused, I would always say "I would never stay" or "I wouldn't put up with that." I think a lot of times we are on the outside looking in and we don't get their reasons for why they stay, only the person staying really understands. I think a lot of us don't take into account how hard is it to walk away from a relationship, for some people in an abusive relationship leaving might be just as hard as staying. The one thing I never understood about controlling people are what are they so scared of. It was interesting how the professor posed us question such as "lets say you always call your boyfriend on your way home from school and one day you forget because there is a shoe sale at the mall and you leave your phone in the car. You come back to your car and you have 10 missed calls, would you leave?" No one in the class said they would, I thought it was weird but not controlling. The professor basically went over how things start out great but how things slowly change over time and people can become more controlling. The professor was saying how when you first meet someone you are in the honeymoon phase so a lot of the things they do that may be red flags a lot of us would brush them off. It's interesting how controlling behavior can start out small and lead to something totally different. When people think of an abusive relationship we automatically assume someone is putting their hands on the person, but that's not always the case and words can cut as deep as a slap to the face.
